11 rules of LaVeyan Satanism

 1. Do not give opinions or advice unless you are asked.

 2. Do not tell your troubles to others unless you are sure they want to hear them.

 3. When in anothers lair, show him respect or else do not go there.

 4. If a guest in your lair annoys you, treat him cruelly and without mercy.

 5. Do not make sexual advances unless you are given the mating signal.

 6. Do not take that which does not belong to you unless it is a burden to the 
    other person and he cries out to be relieved.

 7. Acknowledge the power of magic if you have employed it successfully to obtain 
    your desires. If you deny the power of magic after having called upon it with
    success, you will lose all you have obtained.

 8. Do not complain about anything to which you need not subject yourself.

 9. Do not harm little children.

10. Do not kill non-human animals unless you are attacked or for your food.

11. When walking in open territory, bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask him 
    to stop. If he does not stop, destroy him.